The Best and Worst Writing Advice I Ever Received
… that’s been haunting me for two decades, that you might want to know about too. Keep reading, leave a comment to join this dialogue, then check out the NEW Community Notes section!
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When I was in ninth grade, my first paper full of red ink was returned to me at the end of class one day. I can’t remember the paper’s specific content or context, but I do remember that it was a paper on the Odyssey, which we were reading painstakingly slowly together as a class. I also remember how livid I was when I saw that butchered paper full of so much red it looked like a lexical homicide— so much so that I was shaking.
Up to that point, I had always received glowing reviews and feedback on my writing and reading skills, probably because I had started to write when I had started to read, around the age of four. In kindergarten, they had sent me to the computer lab to write nonsensical short stories so that I wouldn’t disturb the other children while they were still learning their ABCs. I had always been placed in advanced language classes, and I had never received anything lower than an A+ on anything I had ever written for school. I was in the 98th percentile, for crying out loud! How could this paper full of red marks possibly be mine?!
So I, in my state of nascent rage, was, of course, convinced that this teacher had made a grievous mistake. Either that or she was a complete imbecile. And I was bound and determined to find out which it was. I waited for my fellow classmates to leave the room and approached her as she organized her notes and desk for her next class period. She held a neutral expression, as if expecting my reaction. Then, before I could even open my mouth, she told me the best and worst writing advice I have ever received.
I am paraphrasing here, but what she said went something like:
“There will always be opportunities to make your writing better. There will always be something to revise and or improve in what you write. Just take a look at my notes first, okay?”
Then, if memory serves, she said I could rewrite the paper using her edits as my guide if I wasn’t satisfied with the B its first version had earned. I didn’t respond. I simply nodded and walked away. Sure, I was angry but couldn’t exactly argue with what she offered either. Plus, I had been raised to respect people in positions of authority, especially teachers.
I shoved the massacred paper into the bottom of my bag when I left the classroom and didn’t look at it again until I arrived home later that night. When I did finally read the markings on the paper, I was surprised to learn that I agreed with many of the suggestions and edits she had made. Again, I don’t remember the precise details of all the markings she made on the paper. But I do remember how that entire experience felt. And I will always remember what she said to me because it affected how I looked at my writing from that point on, even decades later.
From that point on, I started to view everything I wrote as something that could be revised and improved, ad infinitum. Her advice made me realize that sometimes I would need others’ input and perspectives to revise and improve whatever I wrote, as well, which undoubtedly made my writing better in a plethora of ways. It still makes me pause and think about my diction and syntax and voice and tone and, most importantly, my desired audience, every single time I sit down to write.
Her advice also molded me into a humbler writer who was eager to get others’ perspectives and notes, especially when those notes are, as hers were, delivered in a constructive and polite manner with the sole aim of making my writing better. At the same time, I learned not to take those notes too personally or as if they were gospel either. I did say that I agreed with many of her suggestions and edits, not all of them.
Still, as much as this writing advice made my writing better, and me a much better and more intentional and genial writer, it was also the worst bit of writing advice I have ever received. Because if there are always opportunities to revise and edit your writing to make it better, how will you know when your writing is good enough or ‘finished’ enough to submit or publish? How will you know when it’s ‘done’ and ready for its audience?
As much as this writing advice endowed me with the highest standards for myself and my writing, and the patience to meet those standards, it has also led to substantial bouts of crippling perfectionism. I can’t tell you how many times I have adjusted a perfectly coherent and beautiful sentence simply because I could and thought I should, not because the sentence needed adjusting, and not because I was having fun adjusting it. I also can’t tell you how many times the anticipated editorial notes of others (mostly imagined from literary ghosts’ past) have affected what I end up writing— sometimes for the better, sure, but also for the worse.
Even decades later, I weigh this writing advice nearly every day, and I’m still unpacking and uncovering its importance and ramifications. Yes, I want my writing to be the best that it can be. Of course I do. But I also need to know when to stop editing and revising what I write so that I can share and publish what I write. Otherwise, I’d never want to write or publish anything. Or even worse, I would stop enjoying the writing process and what it produces altogether.
Regardless of what traditional publishing and social media conventions dictate, nothing you or I write is or should be considered permanent or un-revisable. Not with the instantaneous editorial capabilities we have at our fingertips in the twenty-first century. And not with all the other writing that’s out there to engage with, much of which should be in conversation with, not contention with, our own writing.
Call me unreasonable, but I believe we should be encouraged to not only hone our writing skills over multiple drafts and works published but be able to change our minds and adapt our writing styles when we receive constructive notes and feedback, without fear of digital hellfire and regurgitated viral reprisals. Perhaps more people would write intentionally and conversationally then, and not reactively or for immediate attention then— if they were genuinely allowed and encouraged to revise and improve upon something already written and published? Particularly those things that they have written and published themselves.
I think we’d have fewer self-avowed ‘experts’ and humbler, wiser writers across the wilds of the internet if more people had received the writing advice I did, especially at such a young age. We’d also have more writers who care more about collaborating and continually improving upon what they’ve written, opposed to staking a claim and doubling down on outdated or harmful notions and premises. And we’d have a lot more writers and readers out there capable of critical thinking and sincere, polite debate and engagement without committing ad hominem attacks and producing exhausting rage bait.
We already have too many writers out there struggling with crippling self-doubt and perfectionism, the downside of heeding the writing advice I mentioned in today’s post. But their writing is, ironically, the writing we need to read most right now, as it is likely more intentional and thoughtful, compared to the pages of rage-bait typically constructed, published, and shared within minutes and without much reflection or care.
I went back and forth on sharing this writing advice in today’s post because I still struggle with it myself. Yet I ultimately decided it was better to risk experiencing and sharing its downsides, which are already alive and well in most thoughtful writers anyway, than not. Why? Because more writers need to understand its benefits than not. As it is right now, expecting to revise and improve upon what you write and read is far better than believing everything you write and read should be perfect and never adjusted, especially in today’s tumultuous digital climate. No?
What do you think? Do you agree with this writing advice? Why or why not? Leave a comment to join this dialogue. And if you have any other writing advice to share, writing advice that has haunted you in both positive and negative ways, please don’t be shy about sharing that in the comments either.
© This work is not available for artificial intelligence (AI) training. All Rights Reserved by K.E. Creighton; Creighton’s Compositions LLC.
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